The story is, that the man was playing the card game that he and his wife designed to promote conversation, and nobody was really having much of a convo so he decided to set up a marketing campaign asking for friends so that his Kickstarter campaign would get going. The guy is using a marketing ploy by asking for more friends but I’m not totally convinced.


Firstly, the fact he says that he’s a good bloke all round means he’s actually probably a terrible bloke. Probably the kind of guy that would ask you to be his friend. In my life, nobody has ever asked me to be my friend and I have never heard of anybody else asking to be someones friend so he’s clearly not normal. And doing that is a characteristic of a bad bloke, so he’s off to a great start.

Next, I have many problems with the description. Every human on earth checks their phone around friends now, and if you don’t I honestly have to question your humanity. Why are people scared of being normal? It’s 2017 mate, come on.

Why can’t you have a meaningful conversation about a dick? Why did you use an asterisk in the word dick? How old are you? 8? There’s nothing better than talking about dicks when you’re throwing stones with your mates. Do normal people really want to have a meaningful convo to their mate anyway? Know your role, mates are best used to have a laugh with, I don’t want to talk about your emotions, I’d rather talk about Spiderman.

This guy reads books? He sounds like the biggest fun sponge in the world. Far out mate. Congrats, you’re literate. Most people don’t read books after the age of 15, but you do at your age? Tell me about your favourite piece of fiction! Seriously, if one of my friends ever asked me about the book I’m reading at the moment or wanted to tell me about the one they’re reading, I’d laugh in their face, go back to watching the footy and never talk to them again.

So I’ve actually cracked why you need friends, card game nerd inventor no fun man. YOU DON’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS!!!! You literally described the most boring person to earth in your description, and if that’s a description of you, I feel sorry for your family, because if they had to choose, they probably wouldn’t like you.